Saturday, June 16, 2007

Happy Father's Day
I know Father's Day isn't until tomorrow but since I've been shopping and getting gifts ready today I guess you could say I'm really in the in Father's Day spirit. I've really been thinking a lot about all the father figures in my life and how very blessed I've been in this area of my life. There's my wonderful dad Patrick, my wonderful step-dad Gerald, my awesome Grandpas who are all passed away, my amazing husband who is an amazing dad to my sweet baby and most of all my Eternal Father in Heaven. Wow just mentioning all of them gets me in tears. I love each of them so much and am so grateful for all the advice, examples, fun times, wisdom, support, protection and love I've received from each of them.
I feel like I've been a slacker in planning a great Father's Day for Robert this year. He planned a fun date night for me for Mother's Day and our special Father's Day date night last night wasn't all that great. We just went out to dinner and since I failed to plan anything specific and because it was kind of late we didn't do anything afterward. And even though we planned on Baily spending the night at her Tia's with her Abuela we ended up picking her up because we missed her too much. It was nice to have a little bit of alone time though and enjoy a dinner at a restaurant without the stress of trying to entertain and keep quiet a toddler. And tomorrow I'm not going to be able to make the roast dinner for him that I was planning because his family's having a get-together at the park. I asked him if there was anything special he wanted me to make for lunch or something and he's absolutely no help with that. Hopefully I'll think of something to make his day special. I did get him some pretty cool gifts though. I got him a tie with Baily's picture all over it although that won't be in until next week (I'm a slacker I know!). I also got him the movie Apacalypto that he loved when he saw it in the theatre because he said it's about his people the Lamanites, a best hits cd of the Counting Crows that he's been really wanting, the DVD "The Testaments," an oil vile for his key chain and a box of one of his favorite treats- toffee peanuts. Not bad, eh? Now hopefully I'll make his day special tomorrow to show him how much I love and appreciate him. I got my dad a t-shirt with a picture of Baily on it that says "Proud Grandpa of Baily Bug," which I think he'll love and Gerald a frosted mug with Baily's picture on it. I think they'll all be pretty happy.
On a spiritual note I've been contemplating what I could possibly do for my Heavenly Father to show my love and gratitude to Him. I've realized there's nothing I could do to repay Him or to compare to everything He's done for me but I can be more obedient and more loving to His children- to have more compassion. I can honor my covenants to Him so much better and do better to make Him part of my daily life by being diligent with my prayers and scripture reading. So that's what I plan on doing for Him even though it's more of a blessing for me.
I have more to write about but my daughter is driving me crazy. She just needs some major TLC so I'll try to write more later. Happy Father's Day!

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Update Please!
Wow... it's been like 3 months since I last posted. And to tell the truth it's been about 3 months since I've done anything even remotely productive. My lame excuse but excuse nonetheless is that I'm 11 weeks pregnant and the last 3 weeks or so I've been pregnant with a vengeance. I've been so sick that I've lost about 16lbs. Now under any other circumstances I would not complain about losing 16lbs. But I've actually felt much better the past two days so I'm praying that the "morning"... ahem "all freaking day long" sickness is coming to an end. I was much worse with Baily and actually lost 27lbs. the first 12 weeks with her so this pregnancy's not as bad. I stopped getting sick with her right at 12 weeks on the spot so maybe I'm lucky and getting away with stopping being sick at 11 weeks. That's my prayer anyway. Not only have I been sick but I've had about as much energy as a peanut and been just about as productive as a peanut. It's miserable. I'm so grateful to have such a wonderful supportive husband who's understanding and not impatient. But why is it I feel bad when he helps out with laundry and cleaning instead of feeling grateful. It drives me crazy! I have felt so worthless and like I haven't accompished anything and it makes me want to scream. Oh and the emotions and hormones... holy cow! I cry at the dumbest things and get so irritated at the dumb things and by the time I react and get crazy and mad I'm like what the heck is wrong with me. It's horrible. Ok... sorry about the venting. I just had to get all that out. Despite the pregnancy woes I am so excited to have another baby again! Robert had finally accepted the reality that I'm pregnant and I think he's over the fear of me miscarrying again so he's pretty excited too. He just doesn't show his emotions like I do. Baily on the other hand isn't quite as excited. Whenever there's baby talk she holds up her little finger to her mouth and says "shhh..." It's so funny. She's getting better about it though. I have a strong feeling it's a boy, Robert won't say what he thinks, my mom says a girl and everyone else is about the same. So I can't wait to find out. We had our first appointment with my new Ob/Gyn Dr. Beck last week and it was awesome. To my surprise he did an ultrasound and we saw the baby perfectly. It was moving around like crazy which can possible attest to my vows that I swear I have already felt this baby move around. It's not specific movements like a kick... just movement that I know isn't gas. I know it sounds crazy but it's true... I have felt this baby already! I'm also huge already. Most of the belly is fat but the difference is that now I can't suck it in and poofs out like a marshmallow. I look 5 or 6 months pregnant and I'm only 3 months. How sad is that? I just pray no one asks me how far along I am and then is surprised to hear only 3 months. That would be so humiliating.
Other than this I really don't have much to report. I seriously have accomplished next to nothing this past couple of months. And I know if I would update daily or even weekly I would have more to write about so I'm gonna try to do better. That's the story of my life... the line I'm always saying- I'll try to do better. But that's all I can do right? Hopefully with this new life of not vomiting 27 times a day (that might be a slight exaggeration), I'll get my rear in gear and get my life back on track. I need and I know my family does. Most importantly I need to focus on working on my spirituality. I've been lacking and it's obvious. I need the Spirit back and I'm ashamed I've been so lax and sporatic about such eternal principles as prayer and scripture study. I will do better!
Oh and I must report that I love my Baily Bug more and more every day. I honestly feel some days that I love her so much my heart hurts. She is at the funnest stage right now with her talking and learning. She's hilarious too. I need to catch up her journal and when I do that I'll update here. I'm getting quite tired and need my baby sleep. Ciao for now!